


The Consequences of Taking Back the House

by mcgarrygirl78



Series: C.J. McGarry: Second Lady [6]
Category: The West Wing
Genre: Drama, F/M, Friendship, Politics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-25
Updated: 2016-04-25
Packaged: 2018-06-04 10:27:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6654343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mcgarrygirl78/pseuds/mcgarrygirl78
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I know that you love me Leo.  You tell me, and I feel it, but politics is  your oxygen.  Sometimes I feel if I deprive you of it, you will cease to be the man I fell in love with.  The man I love."</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Consequences of Taking Back the House

"Baby, are you asleep?"

"If I was, I'm not now. Did we take back the House?"

A smile spread across Leo's tired face.

"We did. The Senate still belongs to the Republicans."

"We'll take the House. Come to bed Leo, its late."

"Actually, I need to talk to you."

Leo sat down on CJ's side of the bed. She propped her pillows and took a good look at her husband.

"CJ..."

"No." her tone was firm.

"You don't know what I am going to say."

"You want to be on the ticket in two years. You promised me."

"Baby, I..."

"You promised Leo. We agreed to one term."

Leo took a deep breath.

"Don't you dare say that there is nothing more important than this." CJ said. "Firstly, it's not true, and secondly, it's how you lost your first wife."

"I feel like I have to do this." He said.

"Why? Did you enjoy a lunatic having a gun to my head Leo? Were you having a blast in Sydney while your son turned seven?"

"Sacrifices have to be made, yes."

"I'm done making sacrifices. One term...we had an agreement. I said I would divorce you, take the children, and move far away. I meant it."

"No budging?" Leo asked.

Tears started to form in CJ's eyes.

"This can't be about my health CJ. I am healthier than most 65 year old guys I know."

"I want to get out of here; live a normal life. We have been married for 8 years and every one has been in the glare of the White House. I want my Central Park West condominium and my dog. I want lazy afternoons and perhaps a little privacy. I do not want interviews, best-dressed lists, and a week of speaking engagements. I just want to be CJ McGarry."

"Can I say something without getting slapped?" Leo asked.

"Yeah."

"That is being CJ McGarry. Our children know about Secret Service agents and lockdowns. They understand as best they can that people want to take their picture, and some may want to hurt them."

"They deserve more." CJ reasoned.

"Once we leave the White House they will still have agents. They will always be threatened to a point because they are our children. What more do you want to give them? They've been overseas; had a 10 foot tall Christmas tree; met foreign dignitaries; Tim is learning Arabic..."

"I'm going back to sleep."

"We should finish this conversation." Leo said.

"This conversation is over Leo. Two years ago, after you disregarded everything but your own wants, you made a promise to me. Dammit, I have let you scrape by on so much...I am holding you to this. If you want another term you can have it without me and the children."

CJ turned her back to him, settling under the covers. Leo touched her shoulder.

"Don't you touch me." She said through clenched teeth.

"I love you Claudia Jean." He said.

"I love you too, but don't touch me and please sleep somewhere else."

"OK. Goodnight."

"Goodnight. Congratulations."

***

CJ woke when she heard the banging on the door. She had no idea what time it was. The curtains were pulled and she was too disoriented to find the clock. There was more banging.

"Mrs. McGarry, please open the door. If you do not I am going to have to break it down. We all know from past experience that that is no fun for anyone involved."

CJ yanked the door open.

"Wha...? What the hell are you out here babbling about Bill? What time is it?"

Bill looked at his shoes.

"Mrs. McGarry, you are very undressed." He said.

CJ looked at her wardrobe...Leo's tee shirt and her typical bikini underwear. She waved away the comment.

"Bill, it has been eight years, and I know you've seen worse. Anyway, I fully intended to get celebration sex last night; no such luck."

"Yes ma'am." He smiled. "I have half the senior staff downstairs worried that you did not come into the office this morning. It's a little after 10:30."

"Damn, is it? It's good to see I can still sleep like a college coed. OK, tell Nora that I need the whole staff in 45 minutes. I am going to shower and dress."

"Yes ma'am."

Bill turned to go, but was back before CJ closed the bedroom door.

"Forgive me for intruding Mrs. McGarry, but..."

"We had a fight about the midterm elections. It was silly really...I'm over it. Bill, you rarely intrude and that is saying something since you spend at least 12 hours a day closer to me than my pantyhose."

Bill smiled, nodded, and went downstairs. 30 minutes later CJ walked into her living room and greeted her staff. The butler, Alistair, walked into the room as she sat on the couch.

"Good morning Mrs. McGarry. Would you like breakfast?"

"No. Just coffee and a croissant with blackberry jam please. Thank you Alistair."

"Very good ma'am."

"What's going on?" Donna asked after he was out of earshot. "Are you ill?"

"No. We need to have an important conversation. The Democrats have taken back the House. Two years ago, Leo walked out on the stage at the Democratic National Convention and announced his intention to run for Vice-President of the United States. He did so without my knowledge or approval...most of you know that. What you don't know is he later made me a promise."

"One term." Nora replied.

"Yeah. This has nothing to do with President Santos; he will run again. Leo made a promise to me...it was the only way I would agree to this life. Well, now we have a bit of a problem."

"What?" Daisy asked.

"The Democrats won the House and Leo has decided to run '11."

"Shit." Donna muttered.

Alistair came back into the room and placed a serving tray on the coffee table. CJ thanked him.

"What are you going to do?" Nora asked.

CJ shrugged.

"Killing him is an option. I'm not sure. We all know that though the election is in two years, campaigning started today and the Republicans play dirty. I told Leo if he tried for another term I would divorce him, take my children, and leave. I meant it."

"No offense, CJ." Jack said. "But that means you already know what you are going to do."

***

"You wanted to see us Sir."

Toby and Charlie walked into the Vice-President's office as Leo spoke on the phone. He waved for them to sit and they did. He joined them after the call ended.

"OK, drop the sir, its just Leo."

"What's going on?" Toby asked.

"This conversation is going to be like déjà vu for me guys. I had the same one with President Bartlet 8 years ago."

Oh God, Toby thought, that was never a good way to start a conversation.

"You both remember how upset CJ was when I decided to run."

Upset wasn't even close. She was livid, screaming, shouting, and crying when she was alone...stone faced in public. She put Josh in the doghouse for the longest time even though she said she forgave him and even managed to do some campaigning for her husband. She felt betrayed, put upon, and overprotective of her children. It wasn't good for anyone in the early days between the convention and move-in day.

"I promised CJ I would only do one term as Vice-President." Leo said, never being one to beat around the bush.

"Why are we talking about this now?" Charlie asked.

"Because reelection started last night." Toby replied. "Taking back the House showed that Santos is strong; they want to smack him down a notch. Do you have ideas for a replacement?"

"Of course I do. No one wants the embarrassment of another Bingo Bob."

"Let's do a short list, start vetting, and get them in the glare of the TV cameras if they are not already there." Charlie said.

He began to write things down in the pocket sized notebook he always carried. Damn, Leo thought, someday it was going to be him.

"Not yet Charlie." Leo replied. "Now we come to the real problem."

"You want to be on the ticket." Toby said.

"I don't know if want is the right word. I want to follow through."

"Four years is following through Leo." Toby said. "Have you spoken to CJ yet?"

"I made mention of it last night. She said her promise still stands and she has no intention of breaking it even if I do."

"What's her promise?" Charlie asked.

Leo hesitated. He did not want to expose too much of himself, or cracks in his marriage. Not that he hadn't known both of these men for a decade...as long as he had known his wife. They saw the best and worse times for the McGarrys. There was no point in hiding it now. Jed Bartlet made some crucial mistakes in the handling of his wife at critical points of his 8 year journey. Leo refused to do that, or did his best not to.

"CJ said if I decided to be on the second ticket she would divorce me, take my children, and move far away."

The room was quiet. Toby absently tapped his pencil on his yellow legal pad.

"So she was angry." Toby said.

"Yeah." Charlie said. "It was the anger talking Leo. If you would permit me, the hounds of hell couldn't keep CJ away from you."

She left once. It was only a week, Tim was so small and Charlie was just growing inside of her. Leo thought she wasn't coming back...it killed him. He hardly ate or slept, and having a drink crossed his mind. It did more than that; it took up permanent residence for a while.

"Why don't we try to compromise, like we always do." Toby suggested.

"If you have an idea I want to hear it."

"We'll do the short list and vet people...quietly. We also keep you on the ticket. If we take back the White House in two years, you stay on as Vice-President for another year. Then you resign, stating that you need to spend more time with your children and wife. We will have the new Vice-President picked before any of that happens."

"I like it." Charlie replied. "As compromises go it really does give both parties a win."

"CJ is not going to feel like it's a compromise." Leo got up, went to his desk and lit a cigarette from the box. He looked at the two men in the room and they knew if they told on him being jobless in two years would be the least of their worries. "She is going to feel as if I am once again disregarding her wishes and feelings...this time with the help of people she loves the most. I will never forget what she said to me. She said it was the last promise I would break."

"You have to solve this now Leo." Toby said. "You're either running or you're not. We will battle for you either way. Run the compromise by CJ and see how it goes. Early next week we will get the wheels turning on possible nominees."

Leo nodded. He needed time to think.

"Thanks guys. The input is appreciated."

"Thank you Mr. Vice-President."

***

CJ returned to work on Thursday, though she and Leo were hardly on speaking terms. It was one of those complicated CJ/Leo battles where no lines were drawn and no demands made. They felt avoidance of both the subject and each other would be fine for now. Leo was leaving for a trip to New England tonight and would not return until Sunday morning.

"Your schedule changed CJ." Carol walked into the room. "Congresswoman Page moved the 12:30 back to 4:30. I am tempted to just cancel it...I don't like the idea of her pushing back the Second Lady."

"Just cancel it." CJ sipped her coffee. She was five minutes from her first cigarette in two weeks. "Janice will need me again and when she does she will come calling. Maybe I can do some online Christmas shopping with that time."

"Online Christmas shopping?"

"Buy some things for my nieces and nephews. If I try to go out the press will hound me and I am not in the mood. Bring me the beginnings of that damn Christmas card list and the party invitations. I need to make sense of it."

Carol nodded, leaving the room. Jack came in.

"You made the tabloids." He laid a copy of The Star on her desk.

CJ sighed, looking at the picture of her and her husband with a tear through it.

"Trouble in Paradise? Yeah, that's original. I am not reading this Jack...give me the jest."

"The jest is that you and Leo, DC's golden couple have been spending less time together since he became Vice-President. On the next page there is a picture of you and your entourage in Dallas. Underneath it there is a picture of Leo with Nat."

"Nat? They are going to drag her into this. She is his personal aide. Why did you bring this shit to me Jack?"

"It's my job. Real papers could pick this up because so much of the news lately has been good news. They call you America's favorite May-December romance."

CJ rolled her eyes. She did not want it to be that kind of day.

"I am not issuing any kind of statement on my marriage until the fucking Times picks it up."

Carol came in with folders she placed on CJ's desk. She started to clear away all the clutter...CJ had gotten messier over the years.

"You have staff in 20 CJ." She said. "I canceled the meeting."

"Yeah. Get me some time with my husband today; before lunch."

"Yeah. What should I tell Margaret?"

"I don't give a damn what you tell Margaret. He better be here."

"OK."

The staff filtered into her office. They discussed the Mexican State Dinner, the speech in Richmond, and the photo shoot and interview with Redbook.

"Redbook wants pictures of the children." Jack said.

"No." Nora said, before CJ could. "We do not parade pictures of the Vice-President's children in magazines."

"They are my children too Nora." CJ said. "Let's hire some kids to play Tim and Charlie, how about that? That could be fun."

They all laughed.

"Maybe the Vice-President and I should do some publicity stills." CJ said. "Try to squash this." She wrote something in her notebook.

"Why? Squash what?" Donna asked.

"They made The Star." Jack replied. "Trouble In Paradise."

The senior staff groaned.

"You have the Christmas card photo shoot next week." Donna said. "We can squeeze in some publicity stills."

"Leo doesn't like to be squeezed." CJ said.

"It will all give the tabloids more fodder." Daisy said. "Those photos are so fake; in a studio somewhere. Why not take pictures at the State Dinner."

"Why not say to hell with them?" Kyle asked. "Happy or unhappy, they are going to bash your marriage. Don't play into their hands with a series of photos. Slam them in Redbook."

"Jack thinks it could become a story." CJ said. "I think he may be right and I want to kill it now."

Joel walked into the room after knocking.

"Hey Joel. Want some donuts?" CJ asked.

"No thank you Mrs. McGarry. Nora, Toby needs to see you. Its business."

"We're done here." CJ replied. "Thank you folks. Knock 'em dead today."

"Thanks CJ."

Nora went around her desk and sat on the edge.

"Here comes the compromise." The brunette said.

"So soon? You think?"

"Toby and Charlie put their heads together. I knew it wasn't going to take too long. Are you and Leo speaking?"

"Not really, but I am sure we will before he goes to New England. You don't have to play marriage counselor."

"You used to with the President. Its my job CJ...I have to take care of you and your position. Are we budging? Is this negotiable? I want to walk into the room with something."

CJ ran her fingers through her hair. This was starting to sound like some Republican-Democrat duke out. She and her husband were haggling broken promises through their staffs. What kind of marriage was that? She did not know how much longer she could do it.

"I don't know." CJ finally answered. "Go in strong, aloof, but willing to listen."

Nora nodded. She went to leave.

"Nora?"

"Yeah."

"Thank you, for the thing. You know?"

"Yeah. I'll see you in a few hours."

***

Leo walked into the bedroom at 8 o'clock. CJ sat at her vanity table. She was supposed to brush her hair but instead ending up looking at herself in the mirror. She felt old and looked it today.

"Hey baby. I am so sorry that I did not have a chance to talk to you today. We were gathering Democrats for the Senate vote next week on Medicare. Sam thinks it could be a 50-50...can you believe it? Damn Macintosh and those Independents."

"You're going to finally have a chance to abuse the power of the Presidency of the Senate." She replied, still focusing on her reflection in the mirror.

He sat down on the bed and looked at her back.

"I am not going to fight you about it. I know how busy you are."

"OK."

"Did you kiss your children?" she asked.

"Yeah. Charlie showed me the new scab she acquired climbing the tree in the backyard. She said it went right through her pants leg and had the proudest look on her face. I love a ballerina who can climb trees."

CJ smiled.

"I see negotiations have begun to save both our marriage and the Vice-Presidency."

"Look at me Claudia Jean."

She turned in the chair.

"What time is Air Force Two leaving for Boston?"

"I'm going out tomorrow morning. I wanted to spend the night with you."

CJ nodded.

"Good, because we were supposed to have celebration sex. You promised, but that doesn't matter to you, does it?"

"CJ, don't say that. I..."

"Take off your clothes Leo."

"I refuse to have angry sex with you. I don't want to put our lovemaking in the middle of this."

"You've never turned down sex before; and I am not angry."

Leo stood from the bed.

"I am tonight. We need to talk."

"There is nothing to talk about. I want to make love and if you're not interested you should have just gone to Boston."

Leo looked at her as she shed her robe and sat on the bed. She had to plan the Christmas party, find something to wear for the Christmas photos, clear her schedule for Charlie's ballet recital next week, oversee the baking of 500 cookies for Tim's school fundraiser...the next three weeks leading up to Thanksgiving were going to be demanding.

"Will you listen to me if I talk?" Leo asked. "Nora gave us the indication that you were willing to listen."

"Us? Who the fuck is us Leo? To quote a great First Lady, don't handle me."

Leo sighed.

"Fine, lets make love then."

"Too late." CJ replied with a smile.

"Dammit CJ!"

"You made a promise to me and you are getting ready to break it. There will be no technicalities; no loopholes you can squeeze through to defend yourself to me."

"There is no room for compromise."

"Is that a question or a statement? I never know with you."

"I will be on the ticket, stay a year, and then resign to spend more time with my family." Leo said.

"OK. Its not too late to make love." CJ said.

He never knew what to do when she was like this. Of course, Leo felt she had every right to be upset. CJ just tended to be unreasonable and irate when she could not get control of her feelings.

"Look Leo, you say another year. So OK, I agree to that. Then the year goes by, and you say midterms, let's wait until midterms. So I do. And another year, and then another, and you've just been a two term Vice-President. So to hell with it...be a two term Vice-President. Please take off your clothes."

Leo couldn't take his eyes off her as he started to undress. It bothered him that he could not read at all what her eyes were trying to tell him. Once in his boxers, CJ pushed everything off the bed. She called him over with her finger.

"Get over here Mr. Vice-President."

Leo smiled, despite his feeling that this was somehow wrong. He touched her and she moaned his name.

"Does it feel good baby?"

"Always. Don't stop."

He made love to her and she was so angry while he did. Honestly, it was some of the best sex of their marriage. CJ went into sensory overload, crying out and crying tears as her climax tore through her body and entered Leo's. He lurched forward, shouting her name as he came inside of her. They were still recovering their breath when the phone rang.

"CJ McGarry." She didn't try to push Leo away as he wiped the tears from her face.

"Its Nora. We need to talk... can you meet Donna and I at the office?"

"Um, yeah, uh...Leo is kind of on top of me right now. Um, a half hour?"

"That is fine." Nora replied, trying to hold in her laugh. "You haven't made up, have you?"

"Not even close. I'll be there."

She hung up, gently pushing her husband to his side of the bed. He looked at her with hooded hazel eyes.

"Where you going baby?"

"Work. That was terrific honey, thank you."

"CJ..."

She threw on a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt, leaned to kiss his cheek, and went downstairs. Leo closed his eyes; he was going to have an early night.

***

CJ sat on the couch as Tim and Charlie watched _Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone_. They'd seen the film a billion times, but could not seem to get enough of it. It was a unanimous decision when their mother asked them how they wanted to spend the afternoon. Since CJ rarely got one of those where her son and daughter were concerned, she was glad to sit through the film for the billion and first viewing. Mitch came into the den on a cold but sunny Saturday, placing popcorn on the floor between the children. He sat on the other end of the couch CJ lay on.

The phone rang, taking her out of the relative peace of her quiet babies and a Stuart Woods novel. This had better not be Nora; unless it was a friendship call...she wanted her Saturday to herself.

"CJ McGarry."

"Hey baby, can you talk?"

"Mmm hmm. What's up?"

"I want to be Vice-President CJ. I know I made a promise to you and I know this will break it, but I have to tell you the truth. We should start with the truth."

"That was very big of you." She got up from the couch and walked in the kitchen. Tim watched her as she went; she promised to spend time with them. "Do you want to know what I think?"

"Yes."

"So do I, because I have no idea. I need to think Leo; this is not an overnight thing for me. I don't want it, honestly. I want to move on with my life; move on with my children and husband. I keep thinking about what you are going to do to keep us here when the second Administration ends...if you win."

"I'll retire." Leo replied.

CJ laughed.

"Don't hand me that. We've been together too long. You'll retire when you die. You spouted the gospel of one term and now you're singing a different tune. You shake my trust Leo; tell me one thing and plan another. You do whatever the hell you want, and I let you. I can take some of the blame. But I have those kids to think about and I can't just think about your wants anymore."

"That is not all true CJ."

"It is true. From the second you walked out on that stage without telling me, this marriage changed. You said one term to shut me up; you're doing it again with the compromise bullshit. Do you care about my feelings?"

"Of course I care. I love you, and if you were truly, irreversibly unhappy, I would do whatever I had to to change that."

'Then don't run in two years. Put aside what you want for what I want. Just once in a decade, could you do that?"

Tim walked into the kitchen and looked at his mother with his father's face.

"Mom, you promised to watch with us." He said.

"Its daddy Tim. Wanna talk to him?"

"Yes." His face brightened.

"I love you Leo; here's your son."

"I love you too."

***

"Do you have a few moments?"

Toby stood as Leo entered his room in their hotel suite.

"Is there something you need Mr. Vice-President?"

"I think you do that to unnerve me. I hate all that pageantry."

"OK. Sit down Leo. What's up?"

"I have a problem and I don't know who else to turn to. I have to trust you Toby; that's why you're here."

"What's wrong?" Toby leaned forward in his chair.

"Do I control CJ? Do I not listen to her; guilt or bully her into doing what I want? Am I ignoring her and the children?"

"Leo..."

"Answer me Toby. I don't want to say this, but I order you to answer me."

Toby looked at him with angry eyes. He had no right to be here demanding these things. This was not work, it was personal.

"Yes, happy? Sometimes you do. You can be controlling, and a bastard. But I know CJ too, and if she was intent on leaving with those kids, she would. There wouldn't be a care about protocol, the media, or your feelings. She would be packing and running as we sat in this hotel room. She's done it before."

"I love her Toby. I love that woman more than I even thought possible. If she ever left me, I would die. At the same time I don't know how to be a husband and a father."

"That is bullshit. You've been doing it for a decade."

"No. I have been married with children. I worked for 16 hours a day until I had a fucking heart attack. I hid symptoms from my wife so she wouldn't force me to stop, to slow down. I'm always in survivor mode Toby. I never spend more than a few hours a day with my kids. I see my wife at little intervals during the day...I can't think of the last non-political conversation I had with her. I can't let my relationship with CJ become my relationship with Jenny."

"Do something about it then." Toby said.

"Yeah."

Toby lit a cigar.

"Is yeah all you have to say?"

"What do you want me to say? I told her that I want to be Vice-President tonight. I also want her, the kids, and my life. Can I do it all?"

"I don't know. You know how hard it is some days for Nora and I. We fight about work, neither one of us spend enough time with the kids. Karenna is barely 10 weeks old and she doesn't recognize me yet. I don't know if I can say I want to spend the next six years like this. My kids will be old and not know me. My wife and I will have spent so much time fighting your battles; we won't have our own to fight for. You're not the only one going through this. Charlie and Zoey, Sam and Ainsley, Donna and Cliff...we are all trying to hold on to everything. Sometimes you gotta let something slip. Our problem, you and I, is we tend to let it be the really important things."

"I am not sure how comfortable I am getting to engrossed in this subject with you." Leo said.

"You talked about Jenny."

"That's different; you didn't have that attachment with my first wife. I know Toby that you are not in love with CJ, in that way. However, you cannot deny your attachment, your close attachment to her. I am not trying to negate your love for Nora."

"I should hope not." Toby replied. "Don't you know that I'm attached to you too? I want to be there for you Leo...that's why I am your Chief of Staff. That is why I am your friend. I resent the implication that I stuck around to be close to your wife."

"Yeah. I'm sorry about that."

"Relax. Have a cigar?"

Toby lifted the top of his mahogany box and pulled out a Cuban.

***

CJ stood on the fringes of the senior staff meeting as they left the Vice-President's office. Toby walked by and looked at her but she averted her gaze to the curtains.

"Margaret I need at least 20 minutes; push everything back except the President and a nuclear holocaust."

"Go right in."

CJ walked into the office. She closed the door and leaned on it.

"Hey, what's going on?" Leo didn't know what else to say. That sounded safe enough.

"I love you Leo McGarry, and I have every intention of standing by you, respecting our vows, and loving you no matter what."

"I believe the compromise is the best way to preserve the sanity of all the parties involved." He replied.

"The only parties in this marriage are you and I. Please stop talking to me like the Vice-President of the United States and talk to me like my husband."

He invited her to sit beside him on the couch.

"I want to finish this out CJ. I want to be a 2 term Vice-President."

"You'll be 72 years old Leo. Tim will be 13 and Charlie 12. You'll be tired, cranky, and quite possibly ill. I don't want to be morbid, but how much time you think will be left. I think that's my greatest fear...my life with you will only consist of the White House. There will be nothing left for us; for me."

"Then I won't be on the ticket. If that will make you happy. Because if you're not happy Claudia Jean, nothing is worth it."

"This isn't resolvable. Stop saying if that makes you happy...you know it will. Stop putting the choice in my hands when the decision was already made. If I give in, and we do this, I am weak. You have all the power and..."

"I do not have all the power. I don't want or need to control you or make you feel as if you have to agree to everything I say. We've never had that kind of relationship. At least I don't think we have."

"What will you do if you are not on the ticket?" CJ asked.

"Move to New York City, buy you your condo and your dog. Try to grow more old gracefully, I guess. I'm not worried about the family...everyone will be fine. Second terms can be difficult; we know from experience."

"I spend a lot of time trying to forget most of it. It really was one thing after another."

"You are my world CJ, not this."

She shook her head.

"We both wish that were true, but its not. I know that you love me Leo, you say it and I feel it, but politics is your oxygen. Sometimes I feel if I deprive you of it you'll cease to be the man I married. The man I love."

"It sounds like you're saying you don't know me."

"I do know you; that is how I knew what you going to say one week ago when you woke me up. If you leave the ticket and Santos loses, it'll haunt you. That is why you brought in Bruno for the second term. You weren't sure you could do it alone after the MS."

Leo nodded, though he hated thinking of Bruno Gianelli and the disaster of Manchester. It was the lowest point in their marriage until Abdul Shareef came along. They made it because Leo refused to give up on her, even if she thought he had. Even if she given up on herself.

"I would feel better if we hold on to the compromise." Leo said. "It gives me the option to back out when the time comes. Charlie is already taking it to the President."

"Yeah. It also makes you look less controlling. That's fine."

"Do I control you CJ? Do I not listen to you; to your reservations and concerns? Am I a bad husband and father?"

"How long have those questions plagued you?" she asked.

"Since I held my youngest child in my arms for the first time. I didn't really know how to be a father...I missed so much with Mallory. We all know how my first marriage ended."

"Relatively amicable after almost 30 years. Tim and Charlie worship you; they think you save the world and always make it home for bedtime kisses. A hug, a kiss, and a round of catch in the backyard...to them that's heaven. They know how busy you are Leo; they grew up in it."

"You did not answer my other two questions."

"I am not sure how. Are you controlling? You can be; it is your take charge nature. Deep down you know that I bite just as loud as I bark if I have to. You don't frighten me or make me think I have to always agree with you. Why are we talking about this?"

The McGarry fights of the past were infamous in the halls of the West Wing.

"We fight Leo, scream, shout, and throw things. We make wonderful love and there are moments of silence where we just hold hands and stare into space. I wish we had more of those. You are not a bad husband, you are Leo McGarry. I love you with my eyes wide open, even if I have to swallow my pride sometimes."

"It is another broken promise. when I made it I kept repeating it to myself over and over that I wasn't going to let you down again. If you leave me CJ, I will die. For a decade now you have been my strength when I felt I could not get up anymore. I put you in unimaginable positions and you excel; you never stop amazing me."

"Some of those positions are fun." CJ replied with a grin.

"And you are exceptional at hiding your anger, sadness, and disappointment with jokes and a beautiful smile."

"I have been known to. We are not normal people; you told me that a long time ago Leo. I came along for the ride saying I understood, but I didn't completely. I am not getting off until the ride comes to a complete stop. Let's just move one day at a time and see where we are in two Novembers."

Leo nodded, taking his wife in his arms and holding her tight. How could she do it...how did she keep brushing the dust off? Did she really love him that much? He could not love him if he went through what she had; bullets, MS, Manchester, Bruno, stalkers, reelection, more bullets, Shareef, heart attacks, and holding the country together with both hands. How was it all OK when the day ended?

"I have work to do." CJ said, distancing herself from him and standing up. "The rumor mill is swirling that our marriage is falling apart."

"When isn't it baby?"

"Yeah, but this time they threw in Nat for creditability."

"My God CJ, you know I would never..."

CJ held up her hand. She was never again going to have that conversation with him. Infidelity rumors were something the McGarrys never bothered to discuss. That happened to other couples.

"We still have to think about it. It is out there Leo. In a couple of years Tim and Charlie will be old enough to read the paper and the Internet."

He nodded.

"We will have dinner tonight with the kids." He said.

"They'll love it...its been a while." She kissed his cheek. "Get back to work honey. I love you."

"I love you too Claudia Jean. If this rumor thing gets out of hand..."

Nat knocked and walked into the office.

"Excuse me Mr. Vice-President. Oh hello, Mrs. McGarry. Sir, Nancy McNally is here."

Leo smiled.

"Great Nat. Five minutes."

She left the room.

"I'll leave through Toby's office." CJ said. "I have to talk to him anyway. Tell Nancy she owes me dinner."

"I will. Have a good day."

"You too. Don't work too hard."

He didn't feel like it was over as she walked out of the side door and he watched her back. He hadn't done something; a piece of the puzzle was missing. Leo sighed as Nancy walked into the office. He walked back into the cold embrace of the day.

***


End file.
